How to Define Your Own Vision of Success in Life

Recently, I was asked a very interesting question as part of my work as a life coach: Do you think that success is determined by external factors or internally through mindset?

Here was my answer: “This is a very good question! And I am not sure I have a set answer for it."

I think it depends

I think it would depend on the individual and the level of self-awareness. I would say that the level of conditioning received and accepted (or not) from the family, the peers, the society about what success might look like can play an important role.

I think we all have a choice in life to define our success, based on our own vision of life and our values, what really matters to us and what we dream to achieve. But if external factors play a role in that definition of success that one decides to have, if it's done consciously then I guess that's fine.

What I am trying to say is defining success based only on what others say/think or following the pressure of society set of norms telling us what success must look like, can be dangerous if we want to thrive and be happy.

So, this is a big question, and I think we all ought to answer that one for ourselves and feel comfortable with our definition of success. In working with my clients, I have noticed that defining their own success can be challenging.

Defining success with axial spondyloarthritis

I was grateful for that question asked to me and the opportunity to reflect on this topic. That question got me to think about the role of a diagnosis such as Axspa can play in that definition. How do we define, or re-define, our vision of success in life once we know we are living with a long-term condition? How do we handle the past vision of success that is no longer realistic?

Because on our case, not only we may have a different mindset post diagnosis, and we also have external factors that can be modified by the fact that we live with a long-term condition that can be limiting in what we can aspire, achieve, and access.

I had to let go of a past life

I certainly grieved for some aspirations I had, for a past life that I had to let go. I needed help along the way to do that work, which I found through counselling. Also, I had to revise my vision of success, and for that I worked with a life coach. I think that made me question what my previous vision of success was, and how it was influenced by external factors. My diagnosis and journey living with AxSpa has changed me and my vision of life. As a result, I dream of different things for my life, and my vision of success is now tightly linked to who I am and what I want. It has been an interesting and transformative process to remove the conditioning I had about success and achievements in life, so I could set new goals that match the new person I am.

Nothing is set in stone, as the condition may change with time, and consequently, we learn to adapt and manage such changes. So that vision of success might need to be amended along the way.

I am curious to hear what you think about that question. Let me know how is it for you, to define your own vision of success while living with AxSpa?