Reasons To Date A Spoonie

Let’s be honest - dating with a chronic illness is tough. A quick glance at my tragic love life would more than confirm this fact. We are already in a toxic relationship with our own immune system, so having one with another human being can often be a challenge.

But I love nothing more than a positive spin, so I thought I would look at some of the perks of dating somebody with a chronic illness. Feel free to work some of these into any chat up lines or online dating bios that you might have! If you’re already in a relationship, use this as a reminder to your partner that they are lucky to be spooning with a spoonie at night!

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Sure, at first glance being tired a lot doesn’t look like much of a perk. But if you think about it, where there is fatigue, there is also loyalty!

Keeping up with dating one person is tiring enough for us spoonies as it is. So not only will you know that if we are making an effort with you then we must really care, but also we are probably running far too low on spoons to even dream of cheating on you! (terms and conditions apply of course)

Plus, after needing to rest up more than most - if anyone knows their way around a bedroom it’s us! Okay maybe not necessarily in that way (but maybe that way too!). At the very least, we probably have some great recommendations for Netflix and chill nights what with all the extra down time we’ve had to research. Plus, our bedroom set up is probably extra comfy to accommodate our condition so the cuddles are sure to be unbelievable – as long as you don’t put us in a painful position!

Perfect excuse

Let’s be honest, we all get invited to social gatherings that we’re less than enthusiastic about attending and no good excuse to get out of. Well, here is a great reason to date a spoonie as we are more than willing to let our partners use the excuse of having to stay in to look after us. Plus, as our conditions are chronic, it means there is no expiry date and can be used time after time!

There’s also the added bonus of our able-bodied partner looking like a modern day Florence Nightingale for being compassionate enough to drop out of a social engagement to look after their chronically ill partner.


Speaking of compassion, us spoonies are some of the most compassionate people out there. Having an invisible illness, we know more than anybody that sometimes things are not always as they seem. This will no doubt translate well into relationships with us being very understanding of any issues our partner might be going through.

Not to mention, with all of the trials and tribulations that our own bodies put us through, we probably have an arsenal of coping strategies to share with them to get over most obstacles that life throws at us.

Brain fog

Keeping things interesting in a relationship is something that a lot of couples struggle with. But us spoonies can bring brain fog to the party, which although can be very frustrating can also lead to a few funny events and stories to tell. If you don’t believe me, check out my previous article about seeing the funny side of brain fog here.

Not only will our foggy mind often provide a few laughs, but fans of hide and seek will be in ecstasy with a spoonie partner. You will no doubt be finding household items in locations you would never have considered before - a wallet in the toaster for example. If you think about it, there‘s something pretty artistic about these surreal accidents our brain forces us to make!

What other perks are there of dating someone with a chronic illness? Let me know in the comments below.

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This article represents the opinions, thoughts, and experiences of the author; none of this content has been paid for by any advertiser. The team does not recommend or endorse any products or treatments discussed herein. Learn more about how we maintain editorial integrity here.

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