My fellas holidays
I dread when this happens. My fella has 20 days off for his works holidays and now I'm expected to be the old me. It's been 6 days and I've been forced to go out 5 of those days. I've refused today and tomorrow but it's too late. I'm in so much pain that my 2 days off might be bed days and he just doesn't care. All I'm doing is screwing up his time off. I've told him that holidays also means rest but he doesn't know the meaning of the word. I've told him time and time again that I can't do this and he just puts it down to another flare. It's not, he's just worn me completely out. How else do I get through to him???
Thank you for taking the time to respond. He knows fine well what the disease is and how it affects me but he won't sit in the house for more than a day as he says it's unhealthy for me. I get it , I do but sometimes I just can't do more. He's Spanish so coming here wouldn't help too much lol.
Hi @Nikkifriki it's my pleasure to be hear. I know how hard it is when others around you have a hard time understanding what you really need at the moment to do for you to be okay. No matter what it will always be a challenge for us for others to understand. I think no matter how hard it is, sometimes you have to put yourself first. Because you need to be okay for everything else to be okay around you.
I know I have learned this the hard way. It still gets hard when I have to attend events or have to cancel last minute. But i know if i don't, I will end up paying for it really bad.
I hope today is a better day for you. Sending you warm hugs and thinking of you.
Nicky (Team Member)
Hi my dear @Nikkifriki,
I know this might be hard to hear, but I have learned the hard way that you also need to take care of yourself right now and listen to your body on what it's really able to do. I know when you push and push you will end not being able to do much or more like going into a bad flare. I am sorry you're having a hard time with fella understanding. I have been similar with my husband. There is still a lot of times has a hard time understanding, when I can just keep going out and do what I was able to do.
What has helped a bit is maybe show him the website and other stories that go through the same. Have your tried maybe seeing if he would like to join the community and get to know what you are going through? I also find sharing some quotes sometimes can help the other understand a bit.
I know it can be hard. They can't see what we are going through or what we really feel. This disease is invisible.
Sending you hugs and thinking of you,
Nicky (Team Member)
