How do you manage feeling guilty for canceling plans because of chronic fatigue?
Navigating this was so hard for me. I gave up in the end and actually as I was cancelling all the time. I just don't plan much anymore. Rarely would I commit to anything in the evenings (unless it's something to do with the kids and school). I'll plan a lunch, walk or cup of tea catch up only now. I seem to be able to manage these, so I am comfortable committing. It was really hard when I used to say yes to social events with AS. I always felt I was letting people down, felt pressure to go to events when I wasn't well and this stress just made me feel sicker. Definately lost friends - but no-one one who really love's us.
I worry, because I count on tutoring for income. when I have to cancel due to pain or overwhelming fatigue, I freak that the parents will look elsewhere
Katie Saville Moderator
This is a great topic!
I HATE being the person who is always canceling because I know what it's like to be on the receiving end of it. When I know I'm not well or up for an event, it really gets my anxiety going. I'm continually going back and forth in my mind thinking "what if they get mad?" or "what if I go and I'm miserable?" It's a psychological battle every. single. time. It never gets easier.
I've really had to learn to give myself grace in these situations. For the most part, the people I'm canceling on know that I'm sick and luckily are very understanding. I've lost a few "friendships" because of it, but I firmly believe that those were just not my people and not who I need in my corner at this point in my life.