Are You Freaking Kidding Me

I can't believe a life long struggle leads to this road. Too many surgeries and misdiagnosed. The daily pain of different body parts flaring up leaves me feeling crazy. Family and friends say this has got to be in my head. Over 10 years of being misdiagnosed lead me here and I still have no hope. They kept saying Fibro and I told them NO.

Neck and back pain

I don't get tired and it sounds like I'm better at coping than most. As soon as the virus ends, it's hip surgery for me,  both sides. That will make surgery number 23. The last 30 days my neck is killing me it feels like it wants to slip a disk the muscles are inflamed and I can't even bend my neck.

The middle of my back feels exactly the same. I can't roll over in bed without yelping. I just wrapped up ablations in my lower back and sciatica. This week I had injections into the buttocks to help with pain but it flared up my symptoms. My heels are on fire and now I'm scared. I just can't take more foot surgeries. 

Can medical bills get any higher?

I'm on disability now and my life has dramatically changed. I was successful and lived a full and vibrant life. No one wants me, no dates, no friends. They are tired of hearing my complaints and again,  think it's all in my head. They can't see what I feel. People are so hard, with no empathy or support.  

The tight finances have me caught between a rock and a hard place. I can barely scrape by and the medical bills get higher. The stress of bill collectors from the medical industry is ridiculous. Heck, some places, before they book your appointment, they want that co-pay upfront.

Making adjustments

I make $11.00 too much to qualify for Medicaid. I'm living below the poverty line. They base the amount of your SSD by the last 5 years of which 4 I was not working and having surgeries.

Two weeks ago my new doctor told me I have AS. I don't know if having a label to my condition will help. What does it change? I have to make a few adjustments to my life. We'll see if those adjustments make a difference. I'm dejected... It looks very bleak.